Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Full Wolf Moon

I hope everyone had a wonderful Full Wolf Moon Esbat. This moon is so named because it is said that wolves could be heard howling in hunger in the barren winter.

You may recall that I've been working some candle magick since the last full moon, and that energy came to a head last night. My current circumstances also necessitated some additional working. It so happens that this moon is good for courage and cunning (think attributes of the wolf), and that's exactly what I needed.

In a very short amount of time, my work situation became very stressful. I got a promotion (maybe a little bit of previous success/prosperity candle magick working for me) but the amount of extra work that they've put on me since is impossible to get done in eight hours. My bosses also have a nice habit of getting angry with me when deadlines are not met because they told me to ignore them. I admit, the stress is not all them, a lot of it is how I am reacting. I need to stay in this job for a while yet, so I decided to take this Wolf Moon and do something about it.

I set my altar with my candles from the other spell burning away, and meditated on the new task. I took three lengths of black embroidery floss and began braiding them together. I enjoy performing knot magick, perhaps that's the sailor in me. Embroidery floss is a great material because it is made of a natural fiber, cotton, and comes in a variety of colors for any purpose you can imagine. I chose black because I need to bind the negativity involved in the situation, theirs and mine. Braiding is what makes the three pieces of floss into a cord for a bit of added thickness, and it also serves a bit of its own binding.

When my cord had been braided, I tied two knots in it. One for the outside influences of negativity, and one for my own. Before the tying of each knot, I thought about the situation; the negativity coming from my bosses, the unfairness I felt at being yelled at though I did what they asked. I called it all forward, and I got angry about it, and I tied it up in my knot, to bind and hold it there where it won't be released to wreak havoc on my life. I did the same thing for the other knot, only this time, it was more like looking at their point of view; how I reacted that upset them, what I could have done better but didn't because I was so angry at them I didn't see what I was doing. Then I tied my knot and bound that part up too.

The last step was to tie this knotted cord to my security badge. This is something that must be with me at all times while I'm at the office, and it literally ties what I am trying to contain to my work environment.

You may look at what I've done and think it means I did magick on my bosses. That is not so. What I have done was to take the feelings that their actions bring out in me and bind them. It will help me to see that they're not doing these things because they want to cause trouble for me, and it will remind me that I am a good worker and can make better choices. There have already been a few instances this morning where I had to think of my cord hanging from my badge and remember that only I control how I act and react.

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