Tuesday, February 03, 2009

A Hand, a Magazine, and a Turkey Baster

LDS is going through the slow process of getting daycare assistance for Gnome and Jelly Bean (they are godson #2 and #3, respectively). For some reason, her case handler is not the person who works the cases out of her zip code. She's also been unable to reach.

She got a call from someone who said she was the assistant of the person who works their zip code and insisted that they needed information on the boys' biological fathers. Apparently LDS and Sqwerl being the two parents of this two parent household is not enough.

The irksome part is that the men who contributed DNA to the boys are not part of their lives in any respect; they're not even paying child support. My friends want it that way; the makers of the respective sperm have no claim to those kids. For the record, they're not interested in such anyway.

So why did this lady insist that they have that information to process the application? Good question! It made us wonder if they would insist on biological parent information if the boys were adopted? Or, if one or both of them were raped by a stranger? Or, if they went through an anonymous sperm donor center? That information is irrelevant to what they're trying to do and I think they were right to feel deeply offended at being asked for it.

There's a strong possibility that this particular case worker assistant just doesn't understand their family dynamic and it's just her little way of pushing her opinions on them. She even had the effrontery to send them information about getting child support.

There is a bright side to this. If their application should be denied for lack of biological father information, they have a back-up plan. It's mostly favorable and significantly cheaper, just not ideal. Basically, the sister of one of their roommates, who has daycare experience, will come to their home to watch the kids for a small salary. The part that's not favorable is that the boys won't get the social interaction with other children, but otherwise, it's a fabulous back-up plan.

I must admit that it makes me glad that I don't have kids to have these worries.

Oh, and as far as the title of this entry...it's best not to ask!

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